i forgot i had a blog

I think I've lost any blogging mojo that I might have once had.  I no longer have the energy to be funny and witty.  I'm out of happy cheery words.  I'm sputtering out.  Empty tank here friends.  At least for today.  

Things have mostly settled into a routine.  School with the kids is about ready to do me in.  It's been a couple of weeks now and it isn't getting any better around here.  M had to eat lunch by herself today, a half an hour late, because it took her over 2 hours to do 10 math problems and I told her she couldn't eat lunch until she was half way done with her math assignment. Addition problems.  It took the whole morning to do 1 journal entry and 10 math problems.  Still not sure what to do with this child.  We argue all day.  About how she wants to go home.  How I'm not as fun as her other teachers.  About how mean I am.  About how I give her too much work.  Ugh.  I feel like I'm assaulted verbally for a good 5 hours a day.  That girl may not have skills with the books but she's got mad skills when it comes to a tongue lashing.  

It has been exhausting.  Utterly exhausting.  I wake up in the morning thinking that I can't wait until it's Friday.  It's been a really long time since I woke up every morning wishing for the weekend. 

Last week I left the house twice.  Once to do grocery shopping.  Once to work on billing for the flight program.  The rest of my week was spent at home. Arguing. Pleading. Promising. Threatening.  

I just don't do leaving the house only twice a week.  But there is no where to go.  And if I go, I have to drive in our monstrosity of a truck - which most days feels like worse option than being stuck in the house.  

There is now only a woman left holding on for dear life just to make it through the day.  Groundhog's Day.  Wake up, school, drip sweat, bed. Wake up, school, drip sweat, bed.   Oh yes, and I've added in running on a treadmill since I don't usually walk further than the outside gate of my house during the week.  I don't do running, but at least it's a way to walk more than 120 steps a day.  Wake up, flop around on the treadmill, school, drip sweat, bed.  

I know we'll survive.  I've never heard of child or parent dying because of homeschooling.  We'll get this figured out right before we leave.  Until then, life goes on.  And I'm going to take a nap.